Dealing With Unwanted Opinions
I’ve been trying to find a polite way to tell someone to shut their mouths and keep their opinions to themselves, but sometimes, I don’t think there is a nice way.
So, I have a family member that is always willing to put her opinions out there–even when no one asked her.
I was told I was being too strict when I didn’t want to put on the television when my daughter was playing with her toys. My reason was, she’s playing, why bother with the TV, she’s already having fun?
When my daughter wanted to breastfeed because she was getting tired or frustrated, her opinion was, “She’s too old for that! Stop that.”
Now, I get it, not everyone supports extended breastfeeding. Most people wean at 12 months, sometimes earlier. That’s okay. But when someone comes over to me and tries to tell me that I’m parenting wrong because my beliefs don’t match with their beliefs, I see that as a problem.
I won’t tell you how to raise your child because I’m not qualified.
It’s your child, the only person who is qualified raise that child is you. I don’t know what goes on in your home. I don’t know what you go through on a day to day basis, nor do I know what problems or challenges you face.
What works for one family, may not work with another. What works for one child may or may not work for another. But what I don’t understand is that why as women do we sometimes feel the need to present our decision as the best ever, and everyone else is just wrong?
There was this article that talked about a mother that potty trained their child at 6months, and the comments were absolutely horrible to other parents who decide to wait longer.
I [sadly] thought that one thing that can unite us women together was the fact that we are mothers; age, race, or creed should not matter.
Since when was it supposed to be about battling ideals? Who’s parenting style is better? Since when do we need to try to validate ourselves with people who are not even in our lives? Who’s pedestal are we trying to put ourselves on?
I think when I come across this family member again (because I will see her again), I think I will say to her, “Instead of sharing your opinions with me. Why don’t write all this down, so that one day when or if you have a child, you can put your own advise to good use, and see how it works out.”
How would you handle the situation?