The past several weeks, I have been quiet. We recently moved into what would be our “forever” place. More like: “we pray that the kids will grow up to adulthood here” place. We have been thankful, regardless of all the bumps we’ve come across, so good or bad days, we are thankful.
However, lately, I’ve felt that I’m not doing enough. Let me backtrack–since the Supreme Court ruling, there has been a sadness through the Catholic community. As if the battle is lost, and there is nothing we can do.
Odd, I don’t have that feeling. I have the feeling that now is the time for us to live our faith. So many evils in the world has happened because we have become lethargic, and apathetic about our faith.
I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So because thou art lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spew thee out of my mouth. (Rev 3:15-16)
A long time ago, I had wished to spend my life in prayer. I hoped to be a nun but found out that was not my calling. Now with my motherhood vocation and being my children’s teacher, somehow I feel like it’s not enough. A part of me wants to go out and do more, be a part of more, but it took time to realize that’s because I am not appreciating what I have been given.
Not everyone can be a Saint Thomas Aquinas or Saint Teresa of Calcutta. We all have different gifts to share with the world. How can I want to do more, when I have yet to fulfill this task that I have been given? How can I want to save my soul, when I have been given the care of young souls to show them the way to heaven?
Everyday, I am aware more and more of the responsibility that we have been given–even more so in the light of the Supreme Court ruling and what that means for children who will be attending public and Catholic schools.
So all parents, whether you are home or not, homeschooling or teaching, you have been given an enormous task. The early years in a child’s life is the most vulnerable. We have been tasked to raise our children to know and fear the Lord in a society that appears to reject God. It is our task to teach them how to be a light in a dark world, but first we must become the light ourselves. We must pray to never become discontented with the responsibility that we have, but rejoice in our chance to be tried. To show ourselves and our ability to handle these tasks.
They saying, “You cannot teach what you don’t have.” Rings so true in our society today.
This is why I say, what we do is enough. To teach them, we must first understand. The only way for us to understand, is to pray for knowledge and understand. Above all, rely on God’s graces for strength.
Have you ever felt that what you’re doing is not enough? What do you do to combat that feeling?