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Frustrations With A Wounded Heart

I had taken a step back from writing on this blog for many reasons. My days are more filled with things to do. Also, I was pregnant most of this year, so my thoughts were mainly mush. However, truly analyzing why it’s been hard for me to write, has been due to the problems that is happening in the Church.

Since 2018 there has been report after report about the problems that are in the Church. Money issues (and mishandling), abuses and misconduct by those in trusted position. If I tried to see if our Pope had anything encouraging to say—I would be sorely disappointed. The words of our Pope has been far from positive for those of us who love Our Lord’s Church.

So, for over a year, it has been hard for me to effectively share my love for my Faith, when all these black eyes are popping up from the abyss. I mean, how effectively can you evangelize when your roof is on fire? I know all of this is in God’s plan. Everything is according to His will. It’s not for me to explain away the problems we have in the Church—yeah we have them. And yeah, the problems is causing a lot of people to lose their faith.

There has been two school of thought about this crisis— either we go about “business as usual,” or continue to shed a spotlight on the issue. As painful as it is, I pray that a spotlight continues to shine bright, so we can see how truly to problem lies. Of course on top of that is to ask for the intercessions of the Saints, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and the Mercy of Jesus to clean up His Church.

It’s hard to watch where this could be headed, it’s hard to watch error rein supreme in the Church. However, I firmly believe that God had not abandoned his Church. I know we are alive today to specifically face this crisis. God would not have it any other way.

So, all out trust has to be in Him. There can be no other way. We can’t rely on the TLM (traditional Latin mass) although, praying the Mass in that form can and does help with your spiritual life. But the TLM alone will not fix the problems in the Church.

The Pope, Bishops, and Priests cannot fix this problem either (some are the problem). And sadly, the laity cannot remove anyone who could be leading the flock astray.

We can remove our funds so that they cannot misuse it. We can put pressure for external investigations. We also have to accept the consequences that comes as well (fewer Churches, bankruptcies of some dioceses, more payouts from hiding abuses).

That will make things more difficult for those in the Church, but we are at a point where only God can fix His Church. Things have gotten so bad that it’s out of the physical world, and the true solution relies on the spiritual.

I would think that the cleric who did the abuse takes personal responsibility for their actions. But nope. We are paying for them to hurt people.

Faith is easy to have when things are going your way. It’s easy to praise God for all the gifts and blessings you have in your life. Faith, should be stronger when you go through a trial.

Most problems we have in our lives either expose the weakness of our faith, or it could strengthen it. In the past year, learning about the coverups, abuses, is enough to shaken your faith.

My prayer after learning about all these scandals, coverups and issues in the Church, that people’s faith will be strengthened. That they will not lose hope or faith.

That we all have the ability to embrace the cross instead of running from it.

And so I will leave with this quote:

“But the LORD says, “Israel and Judah, what am I going to do with you? Your love for me disappears as quickly as morning mist; it is like dew, that vanishes early in the day.”
‭‭Hosea‬ ‭6:4‬ ‭

Let us pray that our faith and trust in the Lord is steadfast.

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