I can remember fond memories of my father who would say, “Go find something to do,” when I would say that I was bored. That was the perfect opportunity to go and find something that I actually liked to do. As I got older though, it was harder and harder to pull away from the responsibilities of life and find a hobby that I was passionate about.
When my daughter was born, the first really hobby of adulthood (and parenthood) was blogging. It was awesome to connect with different moms and to talk with them. Best of all, it was a reminder that I wasn’t alone in this job and that there were others just like me. However, I as I started to have more children, there had to be something more that connected me to a person other than they were a mom like me.
Dabbling in hobbies
For the longest, I struggled to find out what that was. Where was my group? Where did I belong? What am I really passionate about? At first I took up photography. I really like to take pictures, but with children constantly around you (and you having to keep an eye on them) what I thought I wanted to take pictures of, I actually didn’t get any pleasure out of. Turned out I needed to accept what I liked to take pictures of.
After I lost the desire to write for a while (talk about being overwhelmed), and to take pictures, I really felt like I had no creative outlet for myself. That was when things got to much, and eventually I had a health scare. While recovering from that, I made a small note to myself that I wanted to learn how to knit. That was back in 2016.
It wasn’t until my second son (third child) was born, that I decided in 2017 to start with crochet, then moved my way up to knitting. (I’ve written about this before here, if you want to read it.) I honestly didn’t know how much I was going to enjoy crochet and knitting! I finally found a hobby (aside from reading) that suit my lifestyle and personality (I’m truly an introvert). There is no competition, and I can make pretty and useful things for my family and friends.
I went from just crocheting during nap time (blankets were the easiest and biggest projects to complete) to challenging myself and making sweaters. I have made two shawl to date and three sweaters. Other things that I have made has been for the house.
It doesn’t bother me that knitting is slow. That it takes time to make something, I just get pure enjoyment having a finished product. What I’ve learned on the way, and how I have improved my knowledge base with this hobby. I’ve slowly started a knitting book collection (like I need anymore books) that I look through almost on a daily basis.
Leading by Example
As my children are getting older, I am strongly encouraging them to get a hobby. My oldest one is starting to learn to play the recorder, and she’s picking up knitting too. She has dabbled in weaving but right now she hasn’t made a commitment to any hobby in particular.
I couldn’t see how I could tell my children to find something that they love to do, if I wasn’t leading by example. I didn’t even tell them to find a hobby, they saw how excited I was to knit, that my daughter picked up interest in it too. A reminder that I tell them (and myself) that you don’t have to be good at it at first–we all start somewhere. The important thing is doing what YOU can do, and enjoying it.
Comparison can be the thief of joy. – T. Roosevelt.
I’ve experienced that first hand, and it is the truth. To see what others are doing, and not paying attention to your own lane will rob you of joy. You find that you’re more miserable, unhappy with your surroundings and situation because it doesn’t look like someone else’s path.
To be in your late 30s, and still having babies (my 4th one–yay!), you can sometimes feel like you’re standing still while the world is moving forward. That is a horrible feeling. It’s taken a lot of self growth to accept and be happy with where I am at the moment–but that also means that I had to stop looking at other people.