I am in LOVE with this time of year. I love it so much. For me, Fall is about freedom.
Throughout the year I put [almost] impossible expectations on myself. Telling myself that I must live to “my” expectations.
But the problem was– it was hard for me to distinguish who’s expectations they were.
For a few months, I have been blocked creatively. I don’t know if it was due to all the changes that happened in my life this year (because believe me, there were a lot), and my mind was just tired of it all.
Perhaps, writing wasn’t enough for me this time.
I was blocked and stuck (and secretly miserable).
Could it be homeschooling? Or the perceived pressure I felt when my baby’s first birthday came a long.
I don’t know.
What I do know, is that when I was able to really dust off my camera, and take some pictures that I enjoyed– the pressure to produce was reduced and I was able to create.
And I felt it again. I felt the simple joy of doing what it is that I like to do.
I can feel this freedom surround me in the simple things that I do now.
- I am able to dance more, since I’ve finally found my rhythm in my schedule. It’s not perfect, and I’m sure it won’t stay the same, but I’m going to sail this ship until I can’t sail it anymore.
- Play is the work for children they say, but it is the work for this adult as well. I can easily get caught up in the daily routine that I forget to have fun. But lately, it’s been easier. I’m enjoying it. Not only that, but I’m enjoying seeing Zee play with LittleZ now.
- Just knowing that someone loves me, is a wonderful feeling. It could be your spouse that helps you feel this way, or just know that even your kid is having a bad day, and takes it out on you, they do that because you DO mean so much to them. It’s a crazy to think that is why our kids sometimes drive us crazy.
- Knowing that your heart is capable of love. There is more than just you in your life. You do what you do, not because you have to (because really, you don’t HAVE to do anything) but because you love your family. You love the life that you made for yourself. And if you don’t like the life that you made for yourself, you love your family enough to change that situation. Sometimes, all you need is love.
- Drinking a cup of tea, or looking out the window. It’s enough really to just sit there and enjoy it. Enjoy the moment. It’s the small, simple moments that makes up our life.
Trends come and go, the bandwagon of making goals for the upcoming year is always going to be here, but never forget who you are.
The only expectations that matter are the ones you make freely.
There is no shame in just being you, sometimes, that is all anyone needs.
What do you find freedom in?